emotional

i woke up to a beautiful morning today because for the first time in one month, i fell into deep slumber last night (thanks to a wonder sleep-inducing drug i took yesterday). morning rays were beaming brightly at me, as if making its way through the shut window blinds. i leisurely took a bath, half asleep and half awake. my sister knocked because she needed socks to go with her jeans. while i was getting dressed, my sister handed me her send off gift and a card for me and my parents. she also gave me some errands to do while she is away and while i am still around. while she was about to leave, she gave me this tight hug that i would not exchange for anything today. i planted a kiss on her cheek, as if saying my sincerest goodbye. i might not be able to see her again before i leave on monday because she is going on a trip to Batanes and the travel back is not very certain at the moment. i did not show her tears flowed when she closed the door. and deep in my heart, i knew she was crying too.

my low emotional quotient self forced me to open my card and read it. i was, of course, hesitating to do that because i knew i would cry a bucketful of tears. and i did. michee is one of the people i love most. she is not just a sister to me because i know even in my silence, she shares with me my triumphs, cries with me during the most painful experiences, and holds ground when everything seems to fall.

i never knew goodbyes are this difficult. i always thought i am a toughie. and i know this is just the first of the many goodbyes before i leave. how more difficult could it be?

i am leaving the people who love me and whom i love sincerely to explore the world unknown. i hope that life gives me something that's worth it.